the kid with the gun is my neighbor
the two-colored eye man
watches over the domain of the
3-legged dog whose limp is
stiff from metal-pronged puppet strings
daytime suburia is rampant
with casketroses and cement-cold feet
once I saw a man
shoot the car
missing his ragdoll of a wife
sometimes torn faces can only
be temporarily repaired just
like the broken-spinning-tapedeck
bitter apologies never make the
front page gossìp collumn until
the evidense has been
shredded
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
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Original Text:
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125,021 Literary Works • 672,740 Reviews
thanks guys for the loverly reviews...
oh wow...I am so dyslexic in my notebook 'god' is 'dog'
"I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america....one nation, under dog..."
sorry bout that! hope it makes more sense now
CL
The broken structure of this poem reflects the content. I love that.
I think that the first letter in each line should be a capital letter - but this is only insignificant nit -picking.
I didn't really understand the first stanza :
I enjoyed it ! It was really multi-dimentional and it feels like a poem which you could get loads of different meanings from.
Maybe someone could explain it .. ... ... .. ..
The first stanza was a bit rushed and in my opinion in could be split in two.
I liked this idea and it kind of reminds of my poem "Old Mad Tom."
bitter apologies never make the
front page gossìp collumn until
the evidense has been
shredded
Sheesh...powerful.